Compassionate and Kind

What does it mean to be “Compassionate and Kind?” 
 
Compassion literally  means ‘to suffer together’. From this sharing in suffering comes the motivation to help relieve the suffering of others. By taking action in some way, for example, wishing it were different for someone, sitting with someone who has just received bad news or providing a meal to someone in need, we are less likely to become overwhelmed by seeing the distress of others. As we enhance our ability to really see and feel what is around us, our ability to experience compassion grows. We can reach out, feel care, be kind and help others, not just our loved ones or friends but other living beings in our community and in the world. 
 
Being kind and compassionate are core skills that shape relationships between people, and help to create caring communities.
 
There is a growing body of research showing that the roots of compassion are biological and appear in very young children and even in our evolutionary cousins the chimpanzee. Our culture and our environment influence these behaviours and we continue to build skills throughout life.
 
What do these qualities look like?
 
Children and youth demonstrate compassion and kindness when they act on feelings of empathy and concern. Children are compassionate and kind when they spontaneously help others, say kind things, help a child who is sick or hurt, and invite others to join in a game. Researchers have demonstrated that empathy can provide a buffer against aggressive and hurtful behaviour. 
 
Compassion and kindness are not limited to acts for other people. In fact, extending kindness to yourself (self-compassion) is considered an important building block to being truly compassionate with others. Another avenue of kindness and compassion is towards our world: the environment, animals and cultural practices as examples.
 
For a teacher, compassion involves being highly attuned to the child's needs, accepting them for the unique persons they are, and acting in ways that are compassionate and caring and support the child.
 
What does it look like when these qualities are missing or diminished?
 
When children do not feel concern for others, they may engage in hurtful behaviours such as name-calling, taking things from others, hitting, pushing, or teasing.  They will not spontaneously offer to help when another person is sick or hurt.
 
Why is it helpful/useful to have these qualities?
 
The development of compassion, kindness and empathy in the early years is crucial for healthy social and emotional growth.  These positive human qualities help children make and keep friends, understand others’ feelings and behaviours, respond to others’ feelings in an appropriate way, and be emotionally connected with the people around them. 
 
And being compassionate and kind  makes us feel good! Research finds that compassion can activate pleasure circuits in the brain, and makes you happy. Compassion lowers stress hormones and strengthens the immune system, helps people feel less vulnerable and lonely, and even reduces risk of heart disease!  And when individuals develop compassion and kindness it can lead to more compassionate societies. 
 
Let the following action ideas inspire you to promote being “compassionate and kind” in the classroom;
 
Play and share the Kindness video
 
We asked children a simple question: What is kindness? Try asking your students what they think it means to be kind. Show this video to ignite a conversation about kindness!  Does kindness look different at different ages?
 
 
Developing emotional literacy skills includes building an emotional vocabulary.
 
Use any opportunity to point out the emotions of others and give those emotions names. Books provide a wonderful opportunity for this.
 
CHAPTER BOOKS
For older children and adolescents, initiate conversations about the emotions that are sparked by what they are reading at school or for pleasure, a television program, movie or YouTube video.
 
 
Research has connected gratitude with overall well-being.
 
In fact those that practice gratitude consistently report a stronger immune system, increased optimism, fewer feelings of loneliness, more feelings and behaviours of compassion towards other and overall more happiness.  Here is a video to inspire students (and teachers) in the practice of gratitude.
 

Perform some Random Acts of Kindness on your own or as a classroom.
 
Here is an incredible resource of free lesson plans and project ideas for kindergarten to grade 12. Note: you must sign up (free) to access them.
 
Brainstorm a list of kindness ideas with your class and then check out this list of kind acts for teens. 
 

Focus on Kindness in the Classroom.
 
Kindness and Compassion can be promoted at all ages and at any grade level. Doug David, a teacher from the Comox Valley School District, shares his approach of a Kindness Activity “through their eyes” using photography and the creativity of young minds. Download the lesson plan here!
 

 
Become an advocate for teaching kindness and compassion in schools.
 
Share this poster (PDF) with colleagues and parents to begin a conversation about the benefits to everyone.
 

Put "compassion into action"!
 
The Vancouver School Board has created a webpage titled Compassion in Action. Here you will find both elementary and secondary lesson plans and many useful links to other resources including the Charter for Compassion.